Tall Tales Winner

Remember how when you were little and you played soccer and everyone got a trophy for participating?  Well, newsflash.  That's not what really happens in Adult World.  In Adult World you don't get a trophy because you woke up and went to work.  You don't get a trophy because you cleaned the house.  No, you only get a trophy when you do something very cool.

Like win a speech contest.

Shut up.  It is to cool.

So there I am with my first speaking trophy. I won it on Saturday at our Toastmaster's Area Contest. The guy next to me is Doug.  We're both from the same club and he won  a trophy as well.  He won for Humorous Speech and I won for Tall Tales.  The difference being that his speech has to be two minutes longer and roughly true.  Mine can be entirely made up.

Which it almost was.

And I look as though I just crawled out of bed.  Which I sorta did.  It was part of the speech.  But, what you don't see are the spandex shorts  under the yoga pants in which I delivered my speech.  I also wore a pair of goggles and a swim cap.

Note: it's very hard to give a speech with a pair of goggles on because contrary to what you think would be the purpose of  goggles, unless you're in water, they are quite difficult to see out of.  Eye contact is hard to make when you can only make out rough outlines of people.  So you spend a lot of time swiveling your head back and forth slowly to give the illusion that you're not standing in front of a group of strangers in a conference room at the library mimicking swimming in your spandex shorts, but rather talking to them normally.  Which is a littler harder than, say, practicing in front of the mirror.  Or an empty closet.  These are good things to remember.

So my Tall Tale was about a lake monster in Stansbury Lake that I came upon during my last triathlon.  It's kind of dumb, but it's taken me this far.  My next speech is on October 15 and that is the Division Contest.  I will be competing against 4 other Areas.

I have the trophy sitting on the bookcase, right next to my "most improved average" and "first place team" bowling trophies I got last year.  Which I think brings my total trophy count in Adult World close to what I graduated from Kid World with.