2010 Book Review #3

Book: The Help
Author: Kathryn Stockett
Pages: 451

LOVED, LOVED, LOVED this book.  This is a definite must-read.  I was a little apprehensive because it sounded like it could go either way, but from the get-go it was amazing.

The story is set in the early 1960's in Jackson, Mississippi. It follows three narrators: Aibilene, a black maid who is raising her 17th white baby, Minny, another maid who keeps losing her job thanks to her wise-cracking mouth, and Skeeter, a white gal who returns home after graduating from college and suddenly finds her maid, Constantine, has mysteriously disappeared and no one will tell her why.  Skeeter decides it's time for the rest of the nation to see what's going on in Jackson and sets out to tip the town upside down.

The book had every southern thing imaginable in it--from the snotty rich girls to the cooking.  It fit every notion of Jackson, Mississippi I could've imagined.  However, it was hard for me to reconcile my brain to accept that this is what life was like just a mere 50 years ago in the United States.  I kept thinking of it being in the late 1800's and would be jolted back when they talked about watching TV and riding in cars.

I don't know of anyone who grew up with a black maid, but in talking with some of the older ladies at Book Club, some of them knew of people, though it was almost unheard of here in Utah and really the west. 

This is a definite must-read for everyone.  I gained a whole new appreciation for the civil rights era and how hard blacks have been working to be treated equally.

What's For Dinner Wednesday--Corn Chowder

Full Disclosure:  This is the first What's For Dinner Wednesday recipe that was not met with enthusiasm from Wade.  However, I really liked it.  And since it's my blog, I'm going to post it anyways.  Wade said he couldn't place what went wrong with it for him; it was either too oniony or too salty.  I had no problem with it, so clearly it must be him.  In any case, I'll tweak it a little next time and if that doesn't make it edible for him, then I'll move it to my lunch menu, where I have a bunch of stuff that Wade doesn't like.

I found this recipe at my mom's house in her Cooking for Two cookbook from Weight Watchers.  However, I didn't have any of the WW friendly stuff, so my version isn't as healthy for you as it could be.  As always, I did alter it a little bit.  Alterations in ( ).

2 TBS chopped red pepper (didn't have a red pepper, so used green instead.  Flavor would've been a little more enhanced, I think, with a red pepper.)
2 TBS chopped onion (used minced onion from the jar again.)
2 TBS chopped celery
1/2 cup diced red potato (didn't have red potatoes, so I used regular.  Red is a little heartier, but brown worked good.)
1/4 tsp salt
Dash of pepper
1 can chicken broth (the recipe calls for the 30% lower fat-or-something-like-that Campbells Soup.  All I had was full-fat, full-salt, full flavor Swansons)
2 TBS yellow corn meal
1 C fat-free milk
1 C frozen whole corn, thawed and divided.  (Who has time to defrost their corn?  I used canned corn, drained.  I wonder if this is where Wade got the salty taste from?)
1/4 C reduced-fat shredded cheddar cheese (I didn't have reduced-fat cheddar cheese and I didn't measure out the cheese.  The recipe calls to top the soup with the cheese when you serve it and I just stirred it into the pot.  Why?  Because I like cheese.)

Cook red (or green) pepper, onion and celery on medium-high heat with a little oil (olive?).  Saute 1 minute until tender.  Add potato, salt, pepper and chicken broth.  Bring to a boil, cover and simmer 15 minutes until potato is tender.

Place cornmeal in blender.  Process 1 minute or until it's powdered.  (NOTE:  My mom tried this recipe and found the soup to be runny, so she suggested adding 1 TBS cornstarch to the cornmeal.  However, my soup turned out VERY thick.  So some tweaking necessary.  Try it without the cornstarch and then add a little after  you combine everything if it's still too runny.)  Add milk and 1/2 cup corn to blender.  Process until smooth.

Add pureed mix and remaining 1/2 cup of corn to soup pot.  Cook over low heat until thoroughly heated, stirring frequently.

Ladle into soup bowls and top with grated cheese. (Yum, more cheese!)

This was a good soup to have on a cold night and if I would've been a little more proactive, we would've had nice, warm baked bread to go with it.  And Wade would've scooped it up and ate it, declaring it the best thing he's ever tasted.  Oh well.  You win some.  You lose some.

Confession

At the risk of being hunted down by FHW (Feminist House Wives) and ripped of my title as "Least Likely to Win Wife of the Year Award" I'm going to make a confession:

I enjoy ironing.

This is a relatively new discovery.  A few weeks ago, as I was cleaning the house (note: I do not enjoy doing that), I came across an ironing board.

I know!  Like where did THAT come from.

And that reminded me of a conversation that Wade and I have had numerous times over that last 8 years and
8 months: Why don't I iron his clothes?

At first, it was because I said it was because we couldn't really fit an ironing board in the apartment (maybe a little lie) and then it was because we were both working and going to school and really who had the time?  Then we escalated to Sandra doesn't have clothes that needed ironing because she wears t-shirts and jeans, so why doesn't Wade iron his own clothes?

That's where our conversations siderailed.   It's a pretty good argument, I'd say, and so whenever it got brought up again, I would just repeat it.

So what exactly have we done for the past 8 years and 8 months about wrinkled clothes?  It's a trick my oldest brother taught me:  Put the wrinkled clothes in the dryer with a wet washcloth.  Works wonders.  Then you can shower and get ready and bonus! you have a nice warm shirt to put on afterwards.

It's a win-win situation.

However, a few weeks ago when this ironing board miraculously appeared behind the closet door, I was a little intrigued.  How long had it been there?  Was this a subtle hint?  A test?

Now would be a good time to let you in on another secret:  I don't (or I didn't) really know how to iron.  It was one of those things I faked my way through the lessons my mom gave me so I could get back to the things that matter.  I haven't successfully ironed anything in my entire life.

But that Wednesday afternoon, I was determined to teach myself the ins and outs of the iron.

And so I started out.  It was a little tedious at first, but after a few minutes it became very relaxing.  There's something magical about seeing all those little wrinkles disappear.  It's not brain surgery, so I didn't have to concentrate all that hard and I could let my mind wander.

Soon I discovered, I enjoyed ironing.  It was making me a calmer person.  I found other items in the closet  that needed pressing and I went on a spree.

Sunday nights, I set the ironing board up downstairs in front of the television and I iron all of Wade's work clothes for the week. This makes him (understandably) happy as he was the purchaser of the ironing board and his devious plan worked.

The old me would've sniffed this plan out and not acted accordingly out of principle.  But the new me--I sniffed it out, but then I did just what he was expecting.  It's good to let them win every once in awhile.

Spiritual Thought Sunday--Overwhelmed

For the last year or so--almost 15 months if you're counting--I've been wavering between completely overwhelmed and almost-completely overwhelmed.

Like I'm trying to do it all.  By myself.  Uphill.  Barefoot.  In the snow.

And I always see ways that I could improve.  Like how the kitchen at this exact moment looks as though a tornado has run through it and yet I'm sitting here ignoring it because I've cleaned the stupid thing every. single. day. (sometimes twice) for the last 7 days.

Or how the laundry is piling up again even though I had it all cleaned, folded, ironed, and put away just three days ago.

Or how I can't go to the bathroom in peace because somebody wants me to do something.  Right then and there.

And I get a little overwhelmed by how this is my life for the next how many years and some days I can't fathom another day of this existence let alone years.  


My life is feeling a little stretched.  My marriage is feeling a little stretched.  I'm feeling a little stretched.  And I keep wondering how much more I can stretch my life, my marriage, me before something breaks and snaps and stings me in the face.

So, if you're feeling like me...

Sit down.  Take a minute.  Breathe.  Let the dishes go.  Let the laundry go.  Count your blessings.  Talk.  Laugh.  Listen.

Yeah, I know. All easier said then done.

Bits of Spelling Bee Wisdom

Note:  I finally figured out how you--yes, you--can get my posts delivered to your email.  Then you don't have to come back and check up on me every. single. day. (because I know you are!)  You just have to wait until it arrives in your inbox.  And then you can read from there.  If you want to leave a comment, you do have to come back here, but you just have to click on the title in your email.  So look to your right and put your email in that little box.

Pretty nifty, huh? 

Back to today's scheduled programming.

Haulage. 

That's the word I lost to in the district-wide spelling bee championships when I was 11.

Haulage.

It has been 17 years and I still remember that word.  Yet, I have never actually used that word in a sentence. 

First, I remember asking for the definition.

1 : the act or process of hauling
2 : a charge made for hauling
 
That helps.
 
Then I asked that it be used in a sentence--mainly as a stalling technique, but hoping just a tiny bit that something would clue me in.

The ship's haulage was being carried across the sea.

(Or something to that affect.  It's been 17 years folks.)

And somewhere in my brain, I got stuck on the word ship and spelled it as h-u-l-l-a-g-e.  Which was a pretty good guess considering the sentence I was given. 

Oh, and did I mention that I picked the #1 seat?  How's that for pressure?!?

So, in honor of my 11-year old niece, who is headed to the statewide spelling bee in two weeks here are some tips from a seasoned veteran.

1.  Don't pick the #1 seat.  You don't need that kind of pressure.
2.  Always, always, always ask for the definition.  This gives you time to collect your thoughts before rattling off the letters.
3.  Study this year's words, and the previous two years worth of words.
4.  Study the definitions.  Sometimes a word is pronounced differently then you think so you don't remember ever having seen it until you hear the definition.
5.  Don't get too overconfident and speed-spit out the letters.  Your more apt to mess up that way.
6.  Come up with mnemonic phrases to help you remember those hard-to-remember words.
7.  Spend time writing them out as though it were a spelling test.  The act of seeing the words in your head and spelling them out on paper helps your memory retain it.
8.  I'm suddenly realizing that perhaps I should have posted this about 3 weeks ago.  Oh well.  Continuing on.
9.  Convince your English (or is it reading in Elementary?) teacher to give you an automatic A for having gotten this far.
10.  17 years from now, you'll look back and remember what word it was that you missed.  And though you will never use that word in conversation ever again, you and your mom will laugh about it in the car one day.  That is, if you don't win the whole thing and go to Washington D.C. where you're bound to lose to someone who's native language isn't even English.
11.  Have fun.  This is one of those things that not a lot of people will have to pad their resume.  You will be heralded as a genius, once everyone stops laughing at your apparent nerdiness.  You should probably keep it a secret until at least high school.

Looking over this list, with a few tweaks, it's a pretty standard list for most things in life.

Good luck Aud.

What's for Dinner Wednesday--Glazed Pineapple Chops

This week's meal was going to be homemade tortellini, but there are some tweaks that need to be made.  However, as luck would have it, I had another new recipe up my sleeve.  Sorta.  I found it on kraftfoods.com, a great place for low-frills recipes chock full of ingredients you have on hand.

Unless you're me.

But I was not to be deterred.  So without further ado:

3/4 cups Bulls-Eye Brown Sugar and Hickory Barbecue Sauce
1 can (8 oz) crushed pineapple, undrained
1/2 tsp each ground cinnamon and dry mustard
4 bone-in or boneless pork chops, 1/2 inch thick

Heat grill to medium heat.  Mix all ingredients except chops until well blended.  Remove 1/2 cup sauce mixture; set aside for later use.

Grill chops 5 minutes on each side.  Brush with some of the remaining barbecue sauce mixture.  Grill 5 more minutes or until chips are done (160 degrees F) turning occassionally and brushing with remaining sauce mixture.
________________________
Some thoughts.

I had neither the "right" barbecue sauce or the crushed pineapple.  However, I'm swimming in both original bbq sauce and pineapple tidbits, so I improvised.  I added some brown sugar to my barbecue sauce and put my tidbits in a food processor.  Note:  A 20 oz can of pineapple tidbits doesn't necessarily translate into 2 1/2 8 oz cans of crushed pineapple.  It was a little heavy on the pineapple and juice but that's because I tried to alter my 20 oz can into an 8 oz can.

Also, my pork chops were a little on the thin side, so they didn't soak up as much of the barbecue sauce as I would've liked.  Definitely go for thicker chops.

The plus sides were that I loved the grilled pork chop, which is a big, happy difference from the usual oven baked pork chop. I do love that grill--the very one that I got Wade for Father's Day that I think he's turned on once.   I use it a lot though.  And the barbecue sauce was very, very, very tasty.

Hey, the barbecue sauce was tasty.

If I would've had pineapple rings, I would've thrown those on the grill to serve alongside the chops. Unfortunately, pineapple tidbits don't combine back into a ring all that well, so no go on that.

Another good dinner to add to the repertoire.

Spiritual Thought Sunday--Let It Be

Thursday at Toastmasters, we heard a speech about forgiveness.  The speaker told how she could never really understand why her mom was always so angry with her.  It wasn't until she was an adult that she was told the circumstances of her birth.

How she was the product of an affair that her mother had had and how she was a constant reminder of this mistake. 

In her efforts to "forgive"  her mom, she tried to "forget" this new found information and to go back to the way things were before.  However, she found that that wasn't how she could forgive.  Forgiveness is not about forgetting.  It's about letting go.

So today's underlying message is this:  We all have had things happen to us that are unforgivable.  Or at least we believe are unforgivable.  However, part of the human experience is to take those transgressions and not forget them, but let them be. Move on.  Be happy.  Don't allow someone or something to win by taking over your life.  They aren't worth it.

Financial Tips Installment #2--Setting Up a Budget

This is by no means the ONLY way to set up a budget.  It's just how I do it.  I've played around with a bunch of budgets over the years and this seems to be the best method for us.

I set up a budget for every pay period.  There are a few reasons why I do this: (a) I can look at the calendar and see potential money traps (i.e. birthday parties, date nights, etc.) a lot easier if there are only two weeks to look at (b) If something unexpected comes up (like tires or medical expenses) then it doesn't ruin my entire budget for the month and (c) because I'm a micromanager like that.

So each pay period, I open up my excel spreadsheet and enter my figures. 

I have the month-at-a glance on the left.  Then the two pay periods.  Each bill is split exactly in half so that the financial burden doesn't fall on one paycheck.  Presents and dining out are grouped under miscellaneous.  The 0 in column H is the amount left over at the end of the check minus all the estimated expensives.  Whatever is in there is then put on the debt we're trying to pay off BEFORE we start spending that check's money.

My next task is to calculate  how much we overspent the pay period before (column I).  Obviously, most of our expenses are set amounts every month, but there's a lot of room for overspending in groceries, gasoline, and miscellaneous.

At the end of the two pay periods for that month, I then calculate the amount we overspent in those key areas, slap my wrists and go on to the next month.

Over time, I have found that if I *see* how much we've overspent the previous month, I'm a little more mindful of what I'm spending in the future.

I use Quicken to put in all our transactions.  This connects automatically to my bank account and downloads the information so I don't even have to enter it in by hand.  Very smooth.  While it has a lot of cool features on it to do budgets and savings goals and what not, it's a little busy on the screen, hence the excel spreadsheet.

So here's my advice:

Set up a budget however you think your family will benefit the most.  Some people have one check a month designated for mandatory expenses (mortgage, cars, utilities, etc.) and the other check for discretionary expenses.  Some are only paid once a month which has it's pros and cons.  Whatever works for you, set it up.

Next, follow it religiously for the first couple of months, checking in a couple times a week at least, to see if you're still on track.

As you get into your groove, you'll eventually get to where you don't have to check your budget every day to make sure you're still on target.

Re-evaluate your budget every quarter to make sure that it's doing what you want it to do for your finances.

What's For Dinner Wednesday--Lasagna

The hardest thing about lasagna is making it, right?  And homemade lasagna is so much better than that frozen crap you get out of the grocer's freezer, right?  But you have to put in the time.  There's no getting out of putting in the time, but lo and behold I found a recipe that eliminates some of the time involved by using uncooked noodles.  Another good recipe from the Amish.

Man, I'm loving the Amish.

As before, since there's only 2 1/2 of us that eat,  I halved the recipe.  However, I'll give it to you in all it's glory just in case you're ever in the market for a HUGE pan of lasagna.

3 pounds hamburger (Wade and I switched 100% over to ground turkey about 4 years ago, so I used ground turkey)
2 large onions, chopped (didn't have those on hand--again--so minced-onions-in-a-jar)
4 small cans of tomato paste
8 cans water
4 tsp garlic powder
6 tsp basil
salt
4 packages mild Cheddar cheese (I thought the cheddar cheese would be weird, but it wasn't at all.  Also, 4 packages would be a bit much.  I shredded up about 6 oz.  I would say 8 oz would be totally fine.)
2 large containers cottage cheese (I don't like cottage cheese, so I used Ricotta cheese instead)
Parmesan cheese (I just shook some in.  Maybe 1/2 cup?)
Lasagna noodles, uncooked.

Brown hamburger (or turkey) and onions together.  Mix in tomato paste, water, garlic powder, basil and salt and bring to a boil.  Reduce heat to simmer for 1 hour.  (I covered it because I didn't want it to dry out.)

Mix Cheddar cheese, cottage (ricotta) cheese and Parmesan cheese together.  In pan, put small amount of hamburger (turkey) mixture then a layer of noodles, then a layer of cheese mixture.  Next, put a large amount of sauce, a layer of noodles, a little more sauce, and cheese.

Basically just layer it until (a) you run out of room or (b) you run out of stuff to layer it with.

Bake at 350 degrees for 1 hour.

Overall, I thought it was a great meal.  Next  time, I'm going to sneak some spinach in there.  And perhaps serve it with something instead of just the lasagna.  Like a salad or some bread.  But multitasking really isn't my thing.  So lasagna this time.  Lasagna and salad next time.

Baby steps, people.  Baby steps.

Spiritual Thought Sunday--Shutting Your Trap

Nature has given us two ears, two eyes,
and but one tongue-to the end that we
should hear and see more than we speak.
Socrates (BC 469-399)

My Father, The Spy

A few years ago--wow! seven years next month!--my niece was born at 23 weeks.  She weighed 1 pound 2 ounces and stayed in the hospital for six months.  She was released in September under strict guidelines that she not be allowed out in public until the end of RSV season (around April).  My brother and his wife did not take her out of their house for six months except to visit the doctor's.

Both of  my parents' birthdays are at the end of March and my brother thought it would be a nice present--especially for my mom--to surprise her at her house with my niece.  We set this elaborate plan into motion.  How to hold a dinner party at my mom's house without her knowing.  My father's only task was to secure dinner.

In hindsight, I know realize that perhaps this was the worse assignment to give my father.

But, we all arrived that Sunday afternoon and my mom was overjoyed to see her grandbaby.  Then I asked where dad was.

"At the post office."  My mom replied.

"The post office?  That was the best thing he could come up with to get away and secure dinner?  The post office on a SUNDAY?"

And exactly why didn't my mom question this when he left for the post office?  Did he often go to the "post office" on Sunday?

It was then that I realized that perhaps there's more to my dad then what meets the eye.

I grew up not really knowing what my dad does for a living.  Still, to this day, I'm not entirely sure what he does on a day-to-day basis.  When I ask him, he just replies that he's working on military communication.  He's an electrical engineer--I think.  At least that's what I've always categorized him as and that's what (he says) his degree is in.  He's never said anything to make me think otherwise.

However, there are a few things that don't add up.  Like, he might be the worse liar under the sun.  And he needs weird things like anti-static shoes, GPS-enabled watches, and backpacks and hiking boots to carry equipment onto submarines. In Korea.  Also, boat shoes for Germany.

Which only points to one thing--he's a spy.  With a lot of shoes.

For the record, I've confronted him with these allegations and he's neither denied nor admitted to their truthfulness.

Which, of course, is an admission of it's own.

We--as a family--have been joking around for the last few years that perhaps he really is a spy.  A couple of summers ago, my mom went to the spy museum in Washington D.C. with a friend of hers.  Francie made a comment--having no idea that we were on the same wavelength--about my dad being a spy.

Weird.

Growing up, we always went to weird places off the beaten track where my dad insisted on walking 10 feet ahead of us and mumbling in German.  And he's always checking his Blackberry when we're out at restaurants.

Belatedly, I realize that perhaps I blew his cover when I joined Toastmasters.  However, he's played it really cool.  Only missing a few meetings.

Now, it's the first thing that pops into my head.

Mom:  Why do you think your father wants a GPS-enabled watch?

Me: Because he's tired of asking for directions when he parachutes into the forested lands of Germany.

Mom:  Ah.  Well, that makes sense.

If I go missing soon, I guess we'll know the answer.

Proud Mama Moments

• Josh is starting to read.  Like full-on reading.  I've been a little hesitant in nurturing this because what else does he have to learn in kindergarten?  However, he's ready and it's really cute to watch him try to sound out the words.  It's also really aggravating.  Bedtime story time was once 10 minutes.  Now it's like 30. 
• Aunika took 10 steps yesterday.  Unaided.  So, yeah, she's nearing 15 months old and still refuses to walk, but she's SO close.  Which is, actually, really scary because then she'll be impossible to catch.
• I ran into the store the other day while my mom sat with the kids in the car and when I came back, Josh had learned a new trick: How to spell Mississippi.  Why Mississippi, I'm not sure, since I rarely use that word in any conversation nor do I need to know how to spell it for any document I might be filling out.  But, pretty impressive for a four year old.  Best part is that two weeks later, he still knows how to spell it.
• We plopped Aunika on the toilet a few times last week, and Viola!  Success!  However, since she can't walk, it's pretty useless to try potty training her right now.  That, and I don't think she really got the idea.  But perhaps, by 18 months?  
• Josh has figured out how to bathe himself (with soap even) and get out of the tub and get himself into pajamas.  That makes me doubly happy.
• I heard Aunika say "Hi, dada" yesterday.  Nevermind that it's ME who's been with her most of the time since she was born.  I'm not  bitter or anything.  She's also said something akin to "kitty".  
• Josh has a crush on Lego Girls, which I, naturally, like to tease him about.  Why he's so into the boxy, androgynous, yellow-skinned type, I'm not sure.  But at least he's differentiating between boy and girl and is seemingly attracted to the opposite sex.  Nevermind one of his favorite colors is pink.  It takes a real man to acknowledge he likes the color pink.

What's For Dinner Wednesday--Chicken Pot Pie

This was a little more labor intensive than I thought it would be and as a result, dinner was at 8 pm.  However, if you tend to cook a lot of chicken at one time and freeze it, then that will speed up the process.  I halved the recipe because there's only 2 1/2 of us that eat.  The amounts I'm listing here are for the full version.

4 chicken breasts (giggle), cooked        4 sliced carrots
2 diced potatoes                                   1 C frozen peas
1 onion                                                 1 cube butter
3/4 C flour                                            Chicken bouillon granules
1-2 C milk                                            1-2 C water

Crust:
2 C flour                                               4 tsp baking powder
2 tsp sugar                                            1/2 tsp cream of tartar
1/2 tsp salt                                            1/2 C shortening
1/2 to 2/3 C water

Boil chicken in water.  Cut chicken into chunks.  Boil vegetables 15-20 minutes.  Chop onion.  Add butter, onion, flour, bouillon granules, milk and water in pan on medium heat.  (Will thicken--fast).  Add vegetables and chicken to sauce; put in 9 x 13 pan (sprayed with cooking spray).  Top with crust.  (Apparently, sometime during the process you're suppose to make the crust.  That's why dinner was so late.  And that's what I get for following each line of the directions.  Note to self: read everything first and then plan it out better.  So make your crust while the vegetables are cooking.  Roll it out so that it fits nicely over the pan.) Bake at 350 for 30-45 minutes.  (Check after 30 minutes.  Mine was done.)

Overall, this was a pretty good chicken pot pie.  Wade said he liked it better than the store bought ones.  I think I put in too much onion.  So next time, I would use less onion.  But, it was pretty good.  And if I would've been a little more prepared, it wouldn't have taken so long to make.

Say HII to February

Incidently, February's Home Improvement Ideas will be the same as January's Home Improvement Ideas because nothing from the list got done.

Except for I did buy a new lock for the front door. 

That I'm going to have to take back because I also need a matching one for the garage door.

So yeah...

February's list is something like this:

• Repair Window sills
• Change out hardware
• Change out light fixtures
• Hang drapes
• Hang Pictures

Look familiar?  Well, pay close attention because something tells me it's going to look awfully familiar when March rolls around.  But...

Eventually it will get done.