My 8 lb 4 oz Thanksgiving Turkey

After my 36 week check up when I found out that I was already dilated and ready to pop, I had initally thought that the perfect day to have the baby would be the Wednesday before Thanksgiving. That way, Wade wouldn't have to use as much vacation time since he had Thursday and Friday off for the holiday and we'd all be home snug in bed by Saturday at the latest.


After my 37 week check up and the doctor was extremely optimistic that I would go into labor in the next few days, the chances of having the baby on Wednesday looked like a real possibility. So I had to kick it into gear to get everything done I wanted to get done. Josh and I got haircuts on Tuesday afternoon. And then I needed to update the computer at the church since our ward is about to split any day now and I was the only one with a lot of the updated phone numbers. After Josh and I got home from that, I was too tired to do anything more.


Wednesday, I dropped Josh off at my in-laws and headed to class. Then to Toys R Us to finish Josh's Christmas shopping. I got home about 2:00, took a bath and a nap and preceded to work on my to-do list. I got the nursery ready (finally!) and cleaned the house. I was feeling pretty good. Even cooked dinner.


Wade left at about 7:30 to go get his haircut. At 8:00, I started feeling some contractions, but they weren't painful, so I didn't start timing them or anything. I had some chicken in the fridge I needed to cook up so it wouldn't go bad and then I continued cleaning the house. At 8:30, I started timing the contractions--still not painful--and found them to be about 10 minutes apart. I was surprised Wade was gone for so long, so I called him and informed him that this might be it. He asked if he had time to stop by Home Depot really fast. Sure. Why not?


When he got home, around 9 pm, the contractions were coming a little bit faster, but weren't painful, so I continued on with my night. Wade was getting things ready in the car--you know, like wrapping the passenger seat in garbage bags and bath towels. Making sure that my bag and Josh's bag were in there. Pacing around and asking if we should go yet. Things like that.


At 10:00, the contractions were about 8 minutes apart and Wade was talking to his parents on the phone. The conversation went something like this:

Wade: I know. But she doesn't want to go.
Person on phone: Tell her to go.
Wade: I can't. She won't listen.


Finally, I said, let's go. More so that I didn't have to listen to them try to conjole me into going in to the hospital than because I thought I was ready to have the baby. So we left for the hospital at 10:15.


On a side note, my parents were going to be the ones to watch Josh when I went into labor. However, for Thanksgiving, they had gone up to my grandma's. This Thanksgiving trip had turned into a mini-family reunion that I've had to hear about for the last month from my mom. She was less than thrilled that a three-person Thanksgiving meal had turned into a 29-person Thanksgiving feast overnight. And that she would be the one to host it. Never mind that all the dishes--except for the turkey, stuffing and gravy--were doled out to other family members. Since my parents were already up in Idaho, Wade's parents graciously accepted responsibility of Josh while we went to the hospital.


So on the way to the hospital, we were joking around and having a good ole time. Much different than how it was on the way to the hospital with Josh. When we walked in, I was smiling and laughing. It was nearing 11:00 and the nurses on duty thought I was crazy. They dutifully hooked me up to the machines to monitor my contractions.


After checking me and declaring that the doctor was a bit generous in her last assessment the day before, I was told they'd recheck me in an hour and if I hadn't dilated at least a centimeter they were going to send me home.


This is exactly why I wasn't so keen in going in the first place. It's practically the middle of the night and I did not want to have to leave the hospital and come home, just to go back again. So I made Wade walk around with me for 30 minutes. I was going into labor if it killed me.

We hooked ourselves back up and I did progress a centimeter, so it turned into the real deal. The doctor was coming in to deliver twins and so they went ahead and broke my water to speed things up a bit.


It's a good thing that my water did not break in public. There was a lot of it, even some splashing up on the resident doctor who was sitting on the edge of the bed. I had always thought that it was a Hollywood interpretation of a woman in labor when her water breaks and it goes everywhere. Apparently, it does happen. So grateful I wasn't in class or Toys R Us when that happened.

The contractions still weren't very painful and when asked if I wanted an epidural, I said nah. Both Wade and the nurse looked at me like I was nuts. Wade even tried to talk me into one. I got up to use the restroom and could hear them outside the bathroom door debating the use of the epidural and the nurse trying to console Wade that it was okay.

The doctor peeked in to see how I was and just laughed when she saw me sitting there reading a book in between contractions. "What are you doing?" She asked incredulous. "Um, reading my book?" I answered. It was nearing 1:00 and I was on my way to having my baby.

Roughly 30 minutes later, the contractions became really intense. I turned to Wade and said "It's too late to try to do this unmedicated. I'm tired and they really hurt. Go get the nurse." It was that first look of relief that passed over his face that made me happy for my decision. The nurse came in and hooked me up to the IV and finally, the anesthisologist wandered in to give me the epidural. What a relief. My conclusion is that if you're going to go unmedicated, both you and your partner have to be 100% determined to do it. If either one of you is wavering, then it can't be done. I probably should've talked to Wade a little bit more about a natural child birth, but I didn't. I don't feel bad about getting an epidural though, so I guess there's no losers in the situation.

Meanwhile, the doctor was in delivering the twins via c-section so I was told to hold off on pushing by the nurse. There was a lot of pressure, more so than I ever felt with Josh, and I was afraid Wade would have to catch the baby as she swam out. Luckily, the doctor made it back in time. At about 2:30, it was time to push.

Four contractions later--and I'm so happy I had that epidural--Aunika Lyn was born, at 3:02 am. The minute she came out, my entire body felt this huge sigh of relief. I felt better 10 seconds after delivering her than I had felt for nearly 9 months. Of course, I did have that nifty epidural that probably skewed my vision. Everything seemed ordinary. She cried as they lifted her up to me and then they hurried to take her away. I didn't detect anything wrong. Two NICU nurses came in and attempted to clean out her lungs, syphoning up a lot of liquid. She still hadn't given that newly born scream that everyone seemed intent on getting and so they worked at it some more.

Forty minutes later, they weighed her at a whooping 8 pounds 4 oz. and then whisked her off to the nursery. Wade left with them while I--obviously--stayed behind.

The rest of the morning was kind of a blur. I called my parents to let them know Aunika was here and then they moved me to the maternity ward. At about 5:30, they let Wade and I go into the nursery to look at her. She was struggling so hard to breathe, it was heartbreaking to watch. They had her hooked up to oxygen trying to get her to help herself expel the remaining fluid from her lungs. Her chest caved in on every breath in and then she grunted on every breath out. I likened it to when your baby has a runny nose and all you want for them to do is to learn how to sniffle it up or blow it out into a kleenex and you find yourself sniffling for them.

"Just cough" I kept chanting to Aunika. Of course, she didn't and so for 45 minutes we watched her take every breath, willing the fluid to just evaporate.

Wade and I decided to go back to the room and take a little nap, since we had been up all night. I wasn't that tired, but Wade was dragging. Almost as soon as we were asleep, the pediatrician stopped in to give us an update. She was still holding steady in the nursery, but if she'd didn't stabilize out quickly, they'd have to move her to the NICU (Newborn Intensive Care Unit). About 45 minutes later, he popped back in to say that they were going to go ahead and send her down to the NICU since she wasn't getting any better. It was about 7:30 and I figured she'd be back by afternoon at the latest. The nurse stopped by as they were taking the baby down to the NICU and let me hold Aunika for about a minute. That's the longest I'd been able to hold her thus far. She looked so sweet and innocent and neither one of us knew the long ride we'd be in for. The nurse made the parting comment "she'll be okay in a day or two." A day or two?!? I thought maybe this afternoon. I wasn't prepared for a day or two. Or six.

Meanwhile, since it was so early in the morning, the only person I felt like I could call was my mom. I didn't want to worry her unnecessarily, but with Wade gone with the nurse to the NICU, I needed someone to talk to. I told her that everything was okay, but that they took Aunika down to the NICU just in case. She was a bit unnerved, considering the luck we've had in our family involving babies and the NICU, but I reassured her that Aunika was perfectly healthy and just needed some help getting rid of some amniotic fluid she'd inhaled.

Down in the NICU they hooked her up to some high flow oxygen, trying to help her body. Basically, it was up to her as to when everything would happen. The doctor kept reassuring us that this was actually quite normal and that she'd be fine in a couple of hours.

We went back to our room and made phone calls to everyone in the family, letting them know that Aunika was finally here. And then I had to pump to start building my milk reserve for when she'd be able to eat. Pumping was not a pleasant experience.

At about 10:30, my mom called to say they were headed on their way home. They had put the turkey in grandma's oven and then told everyone they were leaving. I felt bad because I didn't expect them to leave Thanksgiving dinner, but my mom was too worried and frantic and was probably driving everyone insane. All that worrying about this dinner, and she wouldn't even be around to enjoy it coming to fruition.

We had few visitors and because of RSV season, we couldn't take Josh in to see the baby in the NICU. Wade caught a few minutes of sleep here and there, but I couldn't really sleep. My parents showed up, right in time to save me from a subpar Thanksgiving Hospital Meal (entitled to it's own blog post...stay tuned), with some leftover pizza and Wade went off to his parents house for the traditional Thanksgiving feast. He even snuck some back in for me later.

Wade headed home with Josh fairly early and my parents came back for another hour or so. Then I headed up to bed. I had to pump, but was out nearly as soon as I was done with that. I slept the best that I'd slept since getting pregnant nearly 9 months before. It was nice to have an entire night of uninterrupted sleep (shhh...I didn't wake up and pump like I was suppose to in the middle of the night.).

Since this post is so long, I'll continue our NICU saga in another post...

Promised Pictures

Here are some pictures of Aunika. Not a lot of people got to come up and see her with the cold and flu season in full swing.

I'll have to post more about the whole ordeal later tonight or tomorrow. We just got home. Poor baby will most likely be in the NICU until Tuesday or Wednesday, but she's doing really good. Even nursed for a little bit yesterday. She's making a lot of progress.

The nurses described her to the doctor as fiesty. That sounds about right if how she was in utero is any indication.

More later, but here are some pictures:

Baby Update

Just an update for those who don't know:

Aunika Lyn was born at 3:02 am on Thursday morning. She weighed in at a whooping 8 lbs 4 0z (pretty good considering I was still 3 weeks out) and is 21 1/2 inches long. I'm still at the hospital, just "borrowing" a computer to plug myself in before I go crazy. I'll dish out the details tomorrow when I get home, complete with some adorable pictures. Suffice it to say that all semester when I was joking about my water breaking during math lecture, I thought I'd be able to walk discreetly out the room. Not so. But luckily for all involved it didn't break anywhere in public or during math lecture. That's a relief.

Aunika is doing really well and we hope to bring her home on Sunday or Monday. (Details to follow).

Baby, Oh Baby

5 cm.

That's what I'm almost at. A lot of information. More than I'd probably tell my closest friends, so why not just tell all of cyberspace, right?

Women show up in full blown labor and are excited to be at 1 or 2 cm. I'm walking around the grocery store at 5 cm.

At this rate, next week, I'll be measuring 10 cm and the baby will smile and wave at the doctor when she checks. She's probably hooked her pinky toes in between my ribs and is holding on for dear life. Feels like she has anyways.

I thought last night was going to be the night. I made it past my midterm on Friday (should've gone into labor, probably would've gotten some much needed sympathy points) and went to see Twilight with some friends last night. I feared my water would break during the movie, but I made it through that as well. Then I laid in bed for 2 hours and couldn't sleep. I moved to the couch after taking some Benadryl and read for awhile. I could feel some contractions, but I was too tired/lazy to go find my watch to time them. Just that when I finally got around to getting off the couch it was 3 am. The contractions weren't particularly painful--nothing like what I had with Josh--but uncomfortable nonetheless. I laid down in bed and eventually drifted off, so I'm guessing I was NOT in labor.

The doctor said that I was too happy to be in labor, so my assessment was correct. I gained four pounds this last week--two pounds for each foot I'm guessing. My footwear is severely limited to flip flops. Hope it doesn't snow.

Sigh.

Light at the End of the Tunnel

Baby Update:

I went into see the doctor for my 36 week check up this morning. I've been feeling crabby and tired for, you know, like 36 weeks and I just want this all to be done with. The good news? There's a date. An actual if-you-haven't-had-the-baby-by-now-we'll-induce-you-date. Tuesday, December 9. I can't tell you what an enormous relief it is to know that in less than three weeks I'm going to finally have this baby.

With that being said, the doctor is skeptical that I'll actually make it that long.

Too Much Information moment coming in

3

2

1

I'm dilated to 3 cm and 75% effaced.

I kind of just shrugged it off, since with Josh I was a 4 for a month. But still, I've made some considerable progress. In any case, the doctor is pretty sure that she'll see me before than (yeah, I've heard that before, so I'm not getting my hopes up too soon.) However, we decided to go with an induction if I haven't gone by the 9th. I'm a little worried about how big this one is going to get. And it's nice to have a date to work towards. My only goal is that I have to be in class on Friday for the midterm. Baby can come anytime after Friday at noon.

And the 9th works out great because then I can still take my final on the 19th (barring no unforeseen emergencies) and still make it to the in-law Christmas Party that weekend (if everything goes well). And Christmas won't be spent in the hospital either.

Basement Update:

Things are moving along quite nicely downstairs. Wade has put in a lot of time the last few nights and the framing is closer to getting done. He's also working on the HVAC ducts. The fireplace got installed last week and the dryer vent was moved. We have a bid for the electrical, so when we're ready, the guy will come in and do the electrical for us. Then we have to get our four way inspection.

Initially, we were hoping to be done when baby came. That dream flew out the window almost immediately. Then we were hoping to have the sheetrock and mud and tape done before the baby came, but that's not going to happen either. So I'm hoping that we'll have the framing, HVAC and audiovisual wiring done before the baby comes, but there's no set schedule for any of it. It'll get done when it gets done.

I keep meaning to take pictures and post them, but I have a hard time getting between the wall and it seems like such a long trek down the stairs. Maybe tomorrow.

Maybe I'm the Only One Who Thinks Like This

I have this mild obsession. It usually centers around not having enough to do, so my mind will wander. I see someone on the street and then I immediately try to conjure up their life story. How they got to where they are at that moment.

I know there are certain laws that must be obeyed. For example, everyone was born. Everyone had a childhood, and now y've evolved into adults. My interest lies in where, exactly, their dreams derailed. I'm fairly certain that their childhood dream did not involve the phase "sleep on the sidewalk on state street during the middle of the day" or "carry stuffed animals around on public transit while wearing a blond wig, high heels, and pajama bottoms".

So when I see one of these characters, I try to envision how their life got off track. Did it start with childhood? Abuse? Neglect? Or did it begin in adolescence, where seemingly benign choices made at the height of peer pressure weren't calculated to include the ramifications for the rest of their life?

When I was riding the bus back and forth to school a few years back, I had ample time to study these specimens. Sometimes, I had very up close encounters. I learned to not completely ignore them, but to not engage in lengthy conversations either. On occassion, I would pop in my headphones--not attached to anything--to give the impression that I was otherwise occupied. I rationalized it as being necessary because you do not want to pick up a stalker on public transportation. While many are harmless, it's good to be cautious.

I joked with my mom that I could write a book on just the people I met while riding the bus and no one would believe that it was real. The fact is, you couldn't make these stories up. I met more than my share of Vietnam Vets. I was saddened by how derailed their lives were even 40 years later. Many are hardly capable of holding a conversation and ramble on to anyone who will listen. I saw newlyweds and nearly-deads, each absorbed into their own lives. I rode the bus every day with one guy, probably around 75, who carried a bouquet of flowers. We got off at the same bus stop at home, and he'd hand them over to his wife, who'd arrived to pick him up. I wish now that I would've struck up a conversation with him about what brought him into town everyday and why the flowers, but I never did.

Just this weekend, Wade and I were walking down 2nd east after viewing the Body Worlds Exhibit downtown. Across the street was a lone guy yelling at the top of his lungs. No one was around. He just kept yelling at nothing in particular. For a brief moment, I contemplated my situation. I'm obviously in no shape to run away from a would-be attacker. We just chose to walk along, avoiding eye contact. I wonder what event happened in his life to lead him to 2nd east on a Saturday afternoon, yelling at no one in particular.

Sometimes, I'll take North Temple home from school. Today, as I was driving along, I noticed a group of late teens standing around outside a store. They were desperately trying to look cool, and I realized that we all went through that stage. I wanted to stop and say "listen, it doesn't matter how cool you look, no one is ever really cool. It's just a perception that you throw out. Don't waste your time trying to be something you're not. Get a life and move on with it. Make something of yourself." But instead, I sped along. They'll come to the realization sooner or later, just like the rest of us have.

Letters Not Sent

Dear California,

Here's my theory: You thought that Prop 8 would be opposed, that the whole vote thing was just a formality. To be honest, I did too. And then we both woke up Wednesday morning and we were bowled over by the final tally. To make myself clear, I'm just a curious bystander in your whole debate thing. I have my personal feelings, and your issue isn't one that riles me up politically. But I do enjoy watching the two sides duke it out.

With that being said, I'm a bit miffed at you nonetheless. You can't stand up, after the election, and declare that this issue is too important for the voters to vote on. Just because you lost. It's like me inviting you to lunch and telling you to choose the restaurant, certain that you're going to choose Sizzler. When you don't choose Sizzler, but rather Red Lobster, I get all red-faced and whiny and say that the issue of where to go to lunch is too important to put to a vote and that I should just be the one who chooses the restaurant. It would be in the best interest of everyone involved.

So there you are. If you had a problem with it from the beginning, you should've said something before the election. Now you just look like a bunch of nincompoops who don't think that the average person can make an informed decision when it comes to casting their ballot, because they didn't choose the side you wanted them too.

I'm really sorry this whole democracy thing isn't working out for you, but I'm glad that we still get to vote on things. That not ALL our freedoms are being taken away.

Best wishes for a happy holiday season.
________________________________________________________

Dear University of Utah Parking Services,

I'm fairly certain that you are the only department on campus that turns a profit year after year. You probably have catered lunches every month with the surplus.

I'm writing you because I'm tired of the parking situation on campus. I, too, wish we were all a little more environmentally aware. That we could all navigate the public transit system with as much finesse as you. But, it's not feasible for us all. Some of live in areas where the public transit system is rudimentary. Others of us have to work for a living.

Oh, I know there's plenty of parking. On the other side of campus. Or for a premium price. But it's not, nor has it ever, been where I've needed it. I have spent countless hours walking back and forth to my car over the years and I'm tired of it. I want to be able to park my car, run in to my one class, run back out and get on with my life. Instead a 50 minute class turns into an hour and a half ordeal. I have paid you for passes over the four years I've attended this lovely University, and this semester, with one class left until I graduate, I have refused to dole out the money. Instead, I time my arrival to be in a certain timeblock as to maximize the chances that I will be able to park at a meter outside my class in President's Circle.

For the record, all of my classes for the past four semesters have been in President's Circle. I'm not sure if you're aware of this or not, but President's Circle has no pass parking in it. Thus, it's a pointless endeavor to buy a pass.

So, Friday, was my last straw. I was late and there was no parking. No parking because it also coincided with the high school football games that were being played at the stadium, where again, there is not ample parking for both students and high school football patrons. The library and bookstore parking lots were filled as well. And so I drove futilely around, willing someone to leave. And I got lucky. But barely.

So, here's the thing. There needs to be more parking. Make a parking structure or something on this side of campus. Why should the liberal arts side get all the good stuff? We're just as important as them.

____________________________________________________________

Dear Baby Occupying My Belly,

In a month or less, we're going to meet you. And you're not going to like that initial meeting because it's going to be cold and all these voices you've been hearing the last few months will finally have faces and they'll be funny looking.
Also, the whole process of getting to the outside world is highly unpleasant for both you and me. The upside is that you've made me so miserable the last few months that I have more motivation to have you on the outside then you have to remain inside.

But we're going to meet and we're going to fall madly in love with you, despite how you look and smell. And we're going to wonder how our lives were ever complete without you. Except for those moments when we're reminded of how life was before you came along. But those moments will be rare and we won't dwell on them for too long. You probably won't let us.

I'm predicting that we are going to have to do some major overhaul on you once you come out. Like, midnight to 3 am is not play time. It's time for you to sleep. And let mommy sleep. Trampoline lessons and yoga will be closed during those hours. (and how did you come to enjoy Yoga so much? Mommy hates it.)

You have lots of pretty clothes. Sorry about all the pink. It'll still look cute and I promise I won't cringe everytime I put you in an all pink outfit that someone found too adorable to pass up. Free clothes are clothes I don't have to pay for, so if they're pink, they're pink. I have your coming home outfit all picked out. There's no pink. Grandma will hate it. But, as you will come to find out, Grandma will hate a lot of things that Mommy is going to do with you. It's just how Grandma is. But she'll love you no matter what. And you'll love her because she'll feed you ice cream at four months when I'm not looking and chocolate when she babysits.

Your big brother is very excited to meet you. Don't worry, he doesn't sound like that all the time. He's just going through a phase right now where he thinks he's a baby elephant. And so he talks like what he thinks a baby elephant sounds like. I'm not sure where this all came from because I've never heard a baby elephant before. But Josh has a huge imagination. You'll probably be roped into his gigs before too long. And yes, he does talk all the time. That probably won't stop once you're out either. You'll learn to tune it out and then it's not so bad.

For the record, he was our experiment child and so you may see some discrepencies in how he's being raised versus you. You will turn out to be healthier and more well rounded. We learned what not to do with him. We will insist that you eat your fruits and vegetables because we've already given up on him. Just remember: Healthier, more well rounded and possibly smarter. It's not because we love him more.

We've narrowed your name down. We're trying hard not to saddle you with a name you'll come to resent us for. I'm sure that over the years, we will do things that will cause you to resent us for some time, but I'm hoping that your name will not be one of them. Let's just start off on the right foot, okay?

So just some final requests as we head down the final stretch here: The route out is not through my rib cage and out my throat so could you please turn? I don't want to undergo surgery to extract you if I can help it. That would just make me cranky and I'm anxious to start running again. You haven't been exactly cooperative in that arena.

Also, I just need an inch or two so I can breathe. If it's not too much to ask. And some decent nights of sleep before you come if you can swing it. There's a very narrow block of time that would be excellent for you to arrive in. Please try to stick to that schedule if you can.

Happy incubating. We will see you soon.